when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
