I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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