How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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