How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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