Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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