Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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