So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
