probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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