So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
