Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize