My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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