this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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