How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
