I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize