p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
