so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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