I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
