I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
