took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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