But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
