we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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