I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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