Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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