just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize
