I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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