How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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