Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
