I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize