I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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