doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
No subtext here. People are naked.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
