Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
