Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Randomize