so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize