it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
and you fell through a lawn chair
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize