Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize