Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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