Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
