I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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