you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
