Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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