i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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