ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
