You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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