ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
