ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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