I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
My liver just had a heart attack.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Randomize
