They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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