We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
