she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Randomize
