zippers are such a cool invention
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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