Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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