Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
